Category Archives: Eileen McDargh

A Radical Redefining For Turbulent Times

By Eileen McDarghEileen McDargh

Consider some events of this decade: The stock market gyrates with unpredictable and heartburning results. Icons of solid companies become straw figures before balance sheets. Children are abducted from their front yards and networks of terrorists spiral throughout the world. Religious institutions cast shadows of duplicity while El Nino brings strange fish to the California coasts. Out-of-control fires gulp huge swaths of Texas and Colorado.  Tornadoes rip through the Midwest and South. A tsunami of apocalyptic proportions devastates the northeast coast of Japan.

It’s enough to cause all of us to stand like the proverbial “deer in headlights”, mutter “the sky is falling”, or else spring into action. The latter would be fine but it’s often a knee-jerk response based on what we’ve done in the past. The trouble is that the present doesn’t look like the past.

Whether you’re leading a Fortune 100 company, a small department, or an enterprise of one – whether you are trying to reinvent your career, launch a new product, or juggle the demands of aging parents and children, resiliency skills have never been more important: radical resiliency.

First: Define the terms. Throw the dictionary definition away. In 1824, Webster defined resilience as: “the capability of a strained body to recover its size and shape after deformation caused especially by compressive stress.”  That definition works for explaining metal but not for the mettle of the human system or an organization. This very definition gives rise to the popular two-word definition: “Bounce back.”

No! Not! Never! Going back to an original state might feel comfortable but it denies the very opportunity of personal and organizational growth. In a constantly changing world, returning to old habits, old structures, and old behaviors can actually be counter-productive.

Second, Webster’s very definition implies that resilience is needed only in the time of stress, of crisis or a bad situation. Not so.

I define resilience as: “The capability to grow through adversity or opportunity so that one becomes wiser, stronger and better able to create a sustainable future.” Now, throw in the word “radical” which means extreme. “Extreme” resiliency means one is willing to turn right when everyone else turns left. It implies courage, tenacity, and taking the uncharted course.  For an individual, it also means listening deeply to one’s inner voice rather than the chorus that surrounds you.

Second: Develop the skill of adaptability. Adaptability is predicated on finding multiple responses to any given situation. It is foundational for resilience and literally rests upon our ability to challenge old ways of doing things, to actively seek different viewpoints, to beware of sacred cows, and to know that solutions can come from anywhere or anyone.

Adaptability requires one to challenge common knowledge. The critical questions are: Why? What if? Who said so?

When a leader and his or her followers begin to ask why something happens a specific way and dig at least five layers down, many startling discoveries can be made.  For example, years ago Ameritech had an employee who spent 3 full days a month creating an extensive report for wide distribution.  Then the question was asked, “Why are we doing this?”  “Who reads it?”  They discovered that few read it and of the ones who did, only a few pages were relevant.

Courage comes into play when we own up to our own reluctance to look for personal and professional blind spots.   The very person we don’t want to listen to might be the very person with that one critical idea. Might I suggest that leaders look for guide dogs.  Guide dogs lead the blind safely through many life situations and often, despite the owner’s insistence, refuse to do certain things because the guide dog senses danger. In short, the guide dog is the one who really SEES what is going on.  Every organization has people on the ground, people who “see” what is happening. Unfortunately, management can be too removed to even consider asking for input. I spoke to an operator at a steel plant who was just weeks from retirement.  He had many ideas to improve the plant but said management was not interested in talking to him.

Adaptability also requires a change of heart, an ability to work on intelligent optimism, reframing what is possible rather than what is impossible. For example, a road crew drilling through a mountain discovered a fresh water spring, such an occurrence can wreck havoc in trying to complete the road. However, this company decided to divert the spring and now sells bottled water while, at the same time, completing the road. That’s reframing.

Pauline just lost her husband Bill, a brilliant nuclear physicist, who could not even form coherent sentences because of the ravages of Alzheimer’s. Pauline’s comment was, “At least he is at peace and his brilliant brain might offer some clues for researchers.”  Reframing.

Adaptability is about thinking and feeling. Agility, on the other hand, is about action and movement.

Third: Develop the skill of agility. Agility is the ability to move quickly and easily. It implies nimbleness, flexibility and speed. It is one thing to intellectually create multiple actions. It is another thing to move forward. Action is the antidote for anxiety.

The trick is to move wisely. Analysis paralysis might take over. Instead, the resilient individual and organization figures what small steps can gain a foothold. There’s ample feedback while actions are taken. Rewards center on the willingness to act, to take risks, and to share results.

Action also looks at physical action. In short, care of the human body. Exercise, sleep, nutrition demand attention in growing through challenge or opportunity. Sometimes, the greatest step one can take is to sleep. Refreshed, the mind has a better chance at being creative and innovative.

Sometimes, when faced with a feeling of powerlessness, doing anything that gives a sense of control can be immensely beneficial. One woman, when fired from her job of 30 years, created a network group at her church for people looking for work.  Another company, caught in the grip of the recession, pulled employees together to explore how costs could be cut without cutting people. Some employees volunteered to work part time so that those with less financial resources could continue.

Fourth: Develop the skill of laugh-ability. Victor Borge said, “Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.” It is also the shortest distance between your brain and your body. The ability to find humor and generate a sense of playfulness actually increases creativity. Laughter separates the serious from the trivial, the trite from the tremendous.

Recall the Chilean mine disaster. Against all odds, these men survived, adaptability (multiple rescue methods and listening to many experts) and agility were paramount.  And they also employed laugh-ability, or at least a way to keep a sense of humor about this very serious predicament.  When a camera was lowered into the mine, one miner gave a tour of their “home”, showing a table where they played cards and held meetings.  At the end of the video, the trapped men burst into a hearty rendition of the national anthem. In short, the men took control where they could, added some spirit to the horror of being trapped, and – as a waiting world discovered, kept everyone alive until rescue.

Play belongs in the realm of laugh-ability. It was the jester of old who spoke the truth in a non-threatening way by using humor and play. Free-form play and improvisation not only break barriers but open up a world of potential ways to handle situations.

“Play is the exultation of the possible” – Martin Buber.

Fifth: Develop the skill of alignment. In 2008, I trekked a portion of the remote western Indian Himalayas, visiting villages as well as ancient monasteries. These still-standing structures, looking fragile in a terrain of rock and stone scoured by wind, rain and snows, have survived because of one thing: they are built on bedrock. The main buildings are lined up on the strongest part of the mountain.

To remain standing, humans too need bedrock. As Viktor Frankel stated, “Man can survive any what if he has a why.” Resilient people and individuals have a reason greater than themselves for keeping on. Whether a child to raise, a song to sing, a book to write, or a community to protect, there is a sense that something or someone matters. That alignment guides adaptability.

Sixth: Look for what energizes. Lastly, the current that flows through all these skills is human energy. Energy is the result of meaningful connections that add the spark of potential and possibility, the catalyst for forward momentum. Think of this as a DNA molecule in which energy is the thread that weaves through all four skills and, in turn, generates more energy as it crosses.

Since 1980, Hall of Fame speaker Eileen McDargh has helped Fortune 100 companies as well as individuals create connections that count and conversations that matter.  Executive Excellence ranks her among the top 100 thought-leaders in leadership development.  Looking for help with work and life challenges? 

Workout Wisdom For The Workplace

By Eileen McDargh

Eileen McDargh

The dictionary defines workout as a “physical or mental effort or activity directed toward the production or accomplishment of something.” Sounds just like our workplaces where effort is expended to provide either a product or a service.  Look closer at a gym and one can learn seven lessons in leading self as well as others for performance improvement.

Lesson #1 –  Everyone needs a baseline: How can you track improvement if you have no idea what is your current capability or baseline? In a gym weight is but one measure of physical ability. You also consider body fat, inches, how many repetitions of a specific exercise and more.  The truth is, you might not lose a pound but become stronger and leaner by muscle development.  What are at least three different baselines that would be good benchmarks for improvement? For example: What is your current number of client contacts that you make?  What is your current level of quality reports you generate?  You get the idea!

Lesson #2 –  To get results, you must vary your routine: I see gym members who have been coming for months and yet there is no sign of any improvement. What I discovered is that their bodies plateaued and the muscles simply remember the exercise and is no longer challenged.  We can do the same thing in our work. There’s comfort in the familiar but there is also little room for improvement.  How might you change your “routine” and try a new way of getting a task completed?  Perhaps you’ll even discover that your routine contains activities that can be discarded or given away!

Lesson #3 –  Plan your hardest work for your optimum time: Everyone has a time of day in which they feel most alert and engaged. To the degree that you can put your most difficult work within YOUR best time slot, do it. I am pretty darn useless after 6pm but I can rise and shine in the early morning which is also my exercise time.

Lesson #4 –  A workplace workout buddy keeps you honest: Think of this as your accountability partner. In a gym, a trainer serves that role: watching, recording, and assisting with specific exercises. In the workplace, many of us serve as coaches to senior level executives. These executives need someone to “keep them honest” and focused. We can all find and use an accountability buddy.

Lesson #5 – Know how much time you can take off without losing your “tone”: It’s a hard fact of life but stop exercising and within three weeks, our bodies lose muscle tone. Doesn’t seem fair and yet, the same thing is true of work. Stay out of the business for months, and it will be harder to jump back in. Whether you are on sabbatical, seeking a new position, or waiting for an employment contract, stay engaged. Read. Network. Practice. Unless, of course, you have decided to retire and move to Fiji.

Lesson #6 –  Be clear on exactly what you can really do: Try as hard as I might, there is no way my body will do a split, a handstand, or a cartwheel.  I watch one man who can move his feet like greased lightning in a kick box routine that would have me tripping myself and everyone next to me. However, I am strong with weights, cardio step, and climbing mountains.

In the workplace, what do you honestly know is not within your forte and never will be? If cold calls make your skin crawl, then learn how to ask for referrals from people whom you already know.  If you are interpersonally intelligent but math leaves you clueless, don’t apply for an accounting position.

Lesson #7 – Strength, endurance and flexibility are all important: Just as these three qualities are a hallmark of a good workout program, so too are they critical for effective career development.  Strength of character and a will to learn provide a breeding ground for success. Endurance allows you to be in the great game of work for the long haul. Without flexibility, rigidity steps in and many an organization has vanished because of outmoded thinking, dated systems, and legacy procedures. What are you doing to grow in strength, endurance, and flexibility?

Workout wisdom truly works out in today’s global, 24/7 world.

Since 1980, Hall of Fame speaker Eileen McDargh has helped Fortune 100 companies as well as individuals create connections that count and conversations that matter.  Executive Excellence ranks her among the top 100 thought-leaders in leadership development.  Looking for help with work and life challenges? Visit today!

Today’s Economy Demands A Critical Skill: Optimism

By Eileen McDargh

Eileen McDargh-optimism

Global warming. Water shortages. Terrorism. Failing health care system. Wars around the globe. Gas prices. Severe economic downturn. Look at the headlines and it’s enough to make you stay in bed.

But wait! There is hope. It’s not the cock-eyed optimism sung about in South Pacific, the hottest show on Broadway. Rather it’s what psychologists in France are calling “intelligent optimism.” Such optimism does not deny the reality of today’s world, but rather seeks to learn how to fashion a life amid such difficulties. Martin Seligman, the psychologist who had made optimism and happiness his life’s work, would agree with the French: optimism can be taught.

Consider these basic steps:

Practice saying this mantra, “This too shall pass.” It always has and it always will Click To Tweet

Focus on what you can control

Don’t get carried away by circumstances you cannot change. You might not change global warming, but you can control your energy consumption. You can’t stop the downsizing in your company, but you can arm yourself with marketable skills. You cannot halt the bleeding on Wall Street but you can rebalance your portfolio. You can take a hard look at expenses and determine what are necessities and what are nice-to-have items that can be dropped. At the same time, do resolve to spend some money or time on something that truly gives you pleasure and lightens your spirit. Two-for-one hamburgers at the local joint with my best friend make my heart glad and brings a smile to two faces.

Reframe the event so that you are not a victim

There is always another way to view a situation. The flight cancellation that caused me to miss (and forfeit) a major engagement was not “planned” to “get” me. It just was. My choice is to figure out what I can do to help the current client and what I will put in place of the cancelled work. When Hurricane Katrina wiped out the home of a nurse, she told me that she focused every day on what she still had and she had her children do the same thing. Every day started with gratitude. She refused to see herself as a victim.

Think “enough”

When we concentrate on what we don’t have, we miss all the many things we do have. The truth of the matter is that if you are reading this article, you do have enough computer power. You do have enough intelligence. You do have enough. It might not be as much as you would like but, for today, it is enough.

Cultivate optimistic responses

Like a farmer tending a field, optimism will never grow unless it is watered, fed, weeded, and nourished. We all have days in which negativity can take over. And, sometimes, that is a wise response because it keeps us grounded in reality. Just make sure it is reality and not the imagination making extraordinary leaps into conjecture. Weed out that conjecture. Ask what you can do to see a result that gives you a sense of power. As Alexander Graham Bells stated, “Sometimes we stare so long at the closed door we fail to see the one that is opening.” The 3M engineer who thought he had failed to make a glue compound that would stick discovered what we all now call Post-In Notes(tm).

Remember the power of generations

Children of depressed parents are more prone to depression. Children of optimists are more prone to be optimists. What do you choose to pass along? Even if your parents were negative, you can break the cycle by stopping, freeze-framing a situation, listening to the negative self-talk, and then literally giving yourself a different message. Yes, this is a practice. A hard practice. But you can make it a habit if you work it over time.


When all else fails, start singing. It is impossible to feel negative when you lift your voice in song. Music allows you to formulate words, to add nuance, and to even get your toe tapping.

Refuse to watch or read anything that puts a dark pall over your day

Instead of tuning into gloom, read a book that transports you to another time and a better mood. Go play with the baby next door. And if you are one of those folks who just can’t stand children, take a walk with your dog, dig in the yard, or get a bucket of balls and practice your golf swing. Better that than walking around with heart and mind weighted down.

Refuse to participate in a chorus of negative conversations

If the only thing you will hear is whining, complaining and moaning. Tell your group that they have three minutes to throw a hissy fit but then it must stop and the next six minutes must be devoted to either finding something positive about the situation or something that they can do.

Lastly, practice saying this mantra, “This too shall pass.” It always has and it always will.

Since 1980, Hall of Fame speaker Eileen McDargh has helped Fortune 100 companies as well as individuals create connections that count and conversations that matter.  Executive Excellence ranks her among the top 100 thought-leaders in leadership development.  Looking for help with work and life challenges?