Sharon Bennett

Examining Your Reflection, Head to Toe

By Sharon BennettSharon Bennett

Mirror, mirror on the wall, who’s the fairest of them all?  When Sandra awakened in the morning, she dragged herself to the bathroom, stumbling over her favorite red pumps, to prepare for her day.  She blinked into her mirror.  Slowly, she turned on the faucet and tried to open her squinted eyes wider with each blink.  Her blurred reflection began to clear.  If she stared deep within her soul, past the physical, deep down into the heart, who is that person she sees and what does she think of her?  She hated getting up every day and going to work.  She’d give anything to win the lottery and be able to escape from her job and her mundane life – to get out and really get to wear her favorite red heels.  The problem is that no matter where she went or how much money she won, she’d still be unhappy. Why?  As women it’s sometimes difficult to find strength and peace within ourselves.

Many of us carry burdens, scars to our souls and psyche from things that happened to us long ago.  We carry that weight around our necks like an albatross.  Everyday we’re beating ourselves up within; an internal battle that others may not see.  This affects what we feel about ourselves, and usually it results in low self-worth, low self-esteem, insecurity, loss of trust, or loss of peace.  We begin to hate our lives, finding no pleasure in the simple things in life, and torment ourselves every moment that we get.

The spirit doesn’t override the ego within you that isn’t ready to hear the truth.  The ego is temporary and is only here during the life of the body.  The spirit is eternal and sits back and waits until we are ready.  There are steps to becoming whole and happy again, and they may look something like these:

When the Student Is Ready, the Teacher Will Be There: Someone along your life’s journey will help to guide you along the right path for you.  Who is your elder, your source of strength, your contact within your community that when they speak, it is without bias, but with honesty and support?  Find them and become a sponge.

Forgive yourself! That incident is already done and maybe you could not help what happened.  Pain is just the negative energy attached to a memory.  Regardless of the circumstances, it is done.  You can’t move forward until you release that part of your past.  So, today, forgive yourself.

Forgive the Person That Wronged You: Forgive the person that wronged you, whether they’ve apologized for it or not.  This is for you; so that you can progress forward.  You must release these bad feelings.  Stressing over it is only going to make you sick in time, and prevent you from having any healthy relationship with yourself or anyone else.  Relationships teach us who we are and what we do or do not want from our future relationships.  Learn from it and move on.

You Are a Beautiful Creature of Our Creator: Know that you were no mistake and anything in your life served its purpose or reason.  You are a beautiful creature of our creator.  You’re invaluable.  A lesson can be derived from every occurrence throughout your day.  Be like a fly on the wall, a student absorbing all that you can and which can make a more positive impact on you.  So, every morning when you arise and look at that reflection speak words of positivity to it.  Mean it from deep within your spirit.  Do it several times throughout the day.

Choose Who You Are Going To Be: It is you that chooses who you’re going to be, you have that power.  So, on this journey choose to be happy, to be a positive and loving person, to be of great value and self-worth.  Don’t let anyone attach your value to money.

Meditate, Cleanse the Negative: Find a form of meditation that will enhance your calm and allow you to cleanse negative things from your mind and body.  For some it’s deep breathing, imagery exercises, yoga or for others it’s prayer.  But, meditate on where you want to go in this life and see yourself there. Harboring negative or ill will towards others can make you sick, like high blood pressure, depression, over eating, and other health issues.

Our Shoes, Ourselves: The life of the person you see in the mirror is invaluable.  What makes this woman?   Is it her curves, her hairstyle, her intelligence, her clothes or her shoes?  All of that is true, but our shoes often represent our inner selves.  We belong to a large sisterhood who share common bonds.  One is our nurturing spirits, and the other is the love of shoes.  From our first pair of satin booties, to playing dress up in our mother’s shoes; the shoes we pick represent who we are in that moment.

So, next time you look in the mirror, show yourself some love.  Smile!  Pump yourself up daily with positive affirmations, and pick out a great pair of shoes to wear for the day: ones that represent yourself free of negativity and at peace with yourself.  You are special, so let everyone around you know it.

With a desire to help others heal emotionally, be healthy and realize their full value, Sharon Bennett, BA, BSN, has been a motivational health and wellness consultant for nearly 16 years. She is the author of the Shoe Fetish Series, the International Library of Poetry’s Editor’s Choice Award 2001 winner, a member of the National Speakers Association and the National Association of Professional Women.  For more information see, call 888-321-9604, or email